The Lead

As I have entangled my thoughts and emotions enough to let the lighter (comparatively) matters be given attention, I now have returned to the project of my romantic fiction. I started by reading the little I've writ. Even though my characters lives have been defined well beyond the typed pages on my docs file, I until about last week, was still missing a lead. You see, as hard as I did try, and though I gave her a totally different life story, my main character did end up being very much like me. That in itself presents the challenge of creating the character that ought to be her counter part. Now, I might have inadvertently given her my temperament but I didn't give her my faith, in every sense of the word. I wish I could say in defining her character I didn't give her my own beliefs or thought process, but it couldn't be helped. 

Of course it is early stage and I can still reinvent her, but I doubt it would make much difference. I'm all too well acquainted with how writers reveal more truth about themselves in their writing than anything else. And the fact that I've never desired to hide myself, nor do I now intend to, presents a hurdle that can not be over come unless I change my mind on the matter. Which I will not. If you hide who you are, even if only in writing fiction of imaginary life of imaginary people, it will lack soul. I can abide by many things, but for my writing or any act in life to be soulless, is something I can't bare. For it's not that it would mark my life, but it would mark eternity. And that, is a very long time. A scar that time will not heal, because it is beyond it.

Anyhow, as I said, I was missing a lead but, only until last week. He came, as all my characters had, on its own, unexpected in moment I had not a single thought pondering on the story. He, still is very vague.  He has no name, no back story, no face, no profession that I yet know of. But that's how Azuza had come to me as well. Unexpected and all of sudden. I do confess her life had come easily to me, but it had taken her a while before she'd trusted me with her name. So in time I shall know his name and life story too. However, I do know what kind of a person he is. It's amusing how my characters personalities and who they are came to me before everything else. Before they even a had a form or a face. Much like real life, what came to me first was, what mattered the most. And in good standing my characters for now may be with clean hearts, how noble their hearts are, only their action will reveal. I shall hope none of them disappoint me. But then, someone of course must. For what life is without conflict? I may hope that conflict that comes their way, comes as a situation and not a person. I've got time before I have to worry about that though. 

Either way, as some cliches cannot be ignored, they shall triumph over it and fall in love. For what other ending could their be of a romantic fiction. Had it just been a romance, the poetry of life would have granted them a noble death to live eternity of happiness. As it is not, they shall, in a manner of speaking, have their happily ever after. In, what I hope, will be a realistic enough manner to be believable as truth. Half truths, that's what a good fiction as made of. Enough reality to let you believe in the possibilities of what could be.